As the years have gone by Jean and I love to tell the stories of our life together. It is a delight for us because it is our shared stories and we can help each other remember the details. The theme for the stories is always the same. Look how God has guided us. It never ceases to amaze us that the God of the universe could care about each of us and be intimately present in our lives all along the way. Seeing His hand in our lives has strengthened our Faith every day.
One of the stories is how we met. It is one of our favorite stories and each time we tell it to each other we seem to remember more and more of the details.
In early September of 1963 I went to the Providence College Mixer which was a dance held every Friday evening. It was open to all and a great place to either take a date or meet someone. There was a small cost for a ticket. Young ladies from the area would often come alone hoping to meet a PC man.
I was just entering my Junior year at PC and usually went to the dances on my own. Other colleges in the area such as Rhode Island College had these Friday night dances also. This evening, I had arranged to meet my friend Bill Warburton at the dance to hang out together and see if we could find someone to dance with. It was getting a little late with neither of us finding anyone interesting to dance with so we decided to go to the dance at Rhode Island College.
As we were getting ready to leave, I said to Bill that I would take one more tour of the dancefloor and then leave to join him at the other dance. As I went out on the dancefloor directly in front of me, I saw a lovely young woman dressed in a red dress and black high heel shoes. She had long raven black hair and was standing alone with her back to me. I walked up to her and asked her if she would like to dance. The music was playing a slow song for dancing and she said yes. I thought she was a beautiful woman and I was delighted that she agreed to dance with me. She said her name was Jean. I am sure she told me her last name but I immediately forgot it.
As we danced, we talked a little about ourselves and she said that she was in her senior year of nursing school at Pawtucket Memorial School of Nursing. When the music stopped, I asked her if she would like to take a "50 cent tour" of the campus and she agreed. With that, we left the dance and walked out onto the campus. I said there was a grotto on the other side of the campus that I would like to show to her. She had a beautiful smile and agreed to take the walk with me.
As we slowly walked, we shared more and more about who we were and I learned that she was an identical twin and part of a family of eleven children. We both found out we had much in common regarding our Catholic Faith and values. After we left the grotto, I invited her to come with me to the student cafeteria to have a cup of coffee. All I can remember is that I had a growing awareness that Jean was a special person and I was greatly enjoying being with her.
While we were sitting having coffee I noticed a guy kind of hovering around us. I asked Jean if she knew him and she said yes that he was the person she had come to the dance with and he would be taking her back to the nursing school after the dance. I asked if he was important to her and without hesitation she responded "not anymore." At that point I did not know the background of Jean's relationship with Joe Flood. I did not know that although she had been dating Joe for several years, quite seriously, she no longer was interested in having a relationship with him.
After I left the dance, I headed for home. On the way back home, I stopped at the Cranston Bowl bowling alley where my best friend Ken Claeson was the manager. Ken stayed up in the lounge until closing which was usually about 1:00 AM. When we sat down at a table I told him I had met the girl I was going to marry. He immediately started laughing at me. He knew that while I dated, I never went steady with anyone and had said many times I was not interested in going steady. I was very excited telling Ken about Jean.
When I left the Cranston Bowl, I went home. My older sister Joan usually waited for me to come home from any dates I had been on so we could talk about it. I also did the same for her. She was in her senior year of St. Joseph's Nursing school. I was very excited about meeting Jean and told Joan I was going to marry her. Joan was shocked. I was considered a mature guy and this statement did not sound like something a mature guy would say. When She asked about Jean's last name, I told her I could not remember. As I described Jean and her family Joan said her last name was Savoie. Joan had gone to Howard Medical Center as part of her training and knew Jean's older sister Carol who was also attending nursing school one year ahead of Jean at the Pawtucket School of Nursing. What a shock to me. Now that I knew Jean's full name, I could call the Pawtucket School of Nursing and try to get a date with her.
It was amazing to me that I was so certain that someday Jean would be my wife.
As Jean tells this story, she remembers that the night Joe Flood asked her to the PC mixer she surprised herself and said yes. She did not understand why she said yes; she just knew she was supposed to go to that dance.
At that time, their relationship, which had lasted almost three years, was over as far as Jean was concerned. She had lost respect for Joe and she could not see him as someday being the father of her children. Joe persisted and often called to ask her out and each time she refused to go out with him. This went on for months. At that time, she was dating other men but no one seriously.
That night, Jean had a date with another PC man which she cancelled to go out with Joe. When her mother asked her about going out, she told her mother that she was going to a PC dance with Joe Flood. Her mother was surprised and said that if she really loved Joe, she needed to commit to him. Jean told her mother she did not love Joe and that she had no idea why she said yes to his invitation to the dance. She told her mother that she just knew she was supposed to go to the dance with Joe.
When they got to the dance Joe informed Jean that he had to collect tickets at the door and he understood that she would be upset with him for not telling her sooner. Jean said that he should not expect her to stand around while he collected tickets and that she was going out on the dance floor.
While out on the dance floor she stood alone. Her mother had advised her whenever she was at a dance not to stand around with a bunch of women but rather stand alone. As she stood there, the boy she broke the date with who had originally asked her out came by but did not ask her to dance.
It was not long before "Mr. Blue eyes," Jack, asked her to dance.
If....
In our frequent visits to the memories of the night we met, Jean and I are struck with the clarity that God loves us and that He planned the whole thing in every detail.
If Jean had not accepted Joe's invitation to go to the dance that night, even though she had another date and she no longer wanted to be with Joe, we would not have met.
If Joe did not have to collect tickets he would have been with Jean and I would not have met her.
If I did not decide at the last minute to take one more tour of the dance floor I would not have met Jean.
If Jean and I did not leave the building after our first dance to go on our tour of the campus it is likely that Joe would have found us and asserted himself as the rightful date of Jean.
If my sister Joan had not known Jean's older sister Carol she would not have been able to give me Jean's last name.
At this point in our lives, Jean and I are true believers that nothing happens by accident and that God's hand is always present through the Holy Spirit.